When you get to heaven, you're gonna feel really bad about all I did for you...

Tell me you've never thought it. Come on... maybe not those exact words but you've thought it. That person you are just so holier than... who you just deserve so many kudos for being nice to, despite the fact that you would be completely justified in ripping into.

That relative you want to strangle at Thanksgiving, but instead you pass them more rolls in hopes they will shut up and eat.

That co-worker you wonder, could we actually replace you with my chihuahua?

That dude at tee-ball who thinks he's freakin awesome because his kid hit the ball out of the infield (and who's kid also happens to be 9 years old).

But you smile and give and put on a really nice aire. Then you get home and lay your head on your pillow and think... insert quote.

Well, I can tell you I've thought it. And if right now you're looking down  on me or judging me, I have 16.3 words for you too... insert quote again.

I hope nobody eats you.

Oops. It was late and I had already sent him to bed twice.  And I had a headache when my 4 year old asked, "Are there going to be any animals in my room tonight?"

"What do you think?" I replied.

He looks thoughtful. Then, half smiling because he knows he's about to give the wrong answer, he says, "Yes."

To which exhausted Daddy says... insert line above.

New post pending

Hello adoring fan (singular).  You know who you are.  I'm out but not gone.  Work got busy on me so my creative juices have actually been used productively.  Once that calms down, I will be back for more jocularity.